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FBN Sells Hardware
Whatever your hardware requirements, computers, peripherals, Local or Wide Area Network, data communications, or telecommunications FBN can provide it, provided you pay 100% up-front. This is not to say the hardware will perform as promised.  FBN has a corporate policy on promises - If we make them, we don't keep them.  But, we still charge the same price as you would pay for equipment which functions properly.  

FBN can offer the market some very unique products.  Only FBN offers LAST, Large Array of Stale Technology.  Why accept a single piece of equipment which can easily be situated in a closet or under a desk when FBN can provide a room full of LAST.  LAST will impress all who graze upon it.  LAST will use more power and require more air conditioning.  LAST will allow you to finally hire the MIS manager you always thought you required.  Hurry, as LAST will not last forever.

FBN can offer another unique feature in all our proposals, TBM.  TBM, or Total Buzzword Management, will help you sell our proposals to management.  We can help you baffle them with a never ending barrage of acronyms and buzzwords.  They will be so intimidated they will dare not admit they have no idea what is being proposed.  How else do you figure we actually sell any LAST systems.

FBN proudly announces the Web Whacker 2000 which provides instant remedies for all your Internet connectivity.  The Web Whacker 2000 will Whack hackers, Whack users attempting to download porn, Whack sexually suggestive Email, Whack Spam, and pretty much solve all your problems with its patented Whacking system.  Nothing can Whack like the Web Whacker 2000 from FBN.

FBN offers a very unique guarantee, we guarantee most of the equipment at least some of the time.  Actually, we can guarantee our equipment will not work most of the time.  If it does work, and you are disappointed, just let us know and we will replace it with defective equipment.

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© 2002  The Twelve Year Old Kid From Across The Street
December 31, 2002